March is all about the WOMAN

The month of March is all about the WOMAN.  This is one of my favorite quotes regarding our sacred sisterhood……..

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“I believe that these circles of women around us weave invisible nets of love that carry us when we’re weak and sing with us when we’re strong.” –SARK

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Nine years ago we were stationed in Hawaii, PARADISE……..but we were away from everyone we knew. Hubby was attached to a special squadron that deployed every few weeks/months, it felt like a revolving door.  We had a beautiful 5 year old girl, and a beautiful new baby girl. At the time, we had recently discovered our eldest daughter, Kayleigh, had been diagnosed with Aspergers, a form of Autism, she would need extensive therapy, and we needed to adopt a whole new approach to parenting.  I remember this was the loneliest and most depressing time of my life, which sadly, I thought would be the best, living in paradise and being a mama.  I specifically remember “that cra cra mama moment” meaning I was either going to cry my eyes out or I was going to visit the mental health hospital; I was in the grocery store on base, picking up a few things when our beautiful baby, Chloe, had the most horrendous blow out EVER, and the very next moment Kayleigh was on the floor having a complete meltdown, because, her shirt tag was bothering her (sensory issues).  I remember many women walking right past me giving me “THE LOOK”, you mamas know what I am talking about; basically that I was an epic fail as a mum, and I need to discipline my child.  In that desperate moment, I met my very first friend on the island, she just walked up to me and gave me a side hug (lol…. since I had the remnants of Chloe’s blowout all over me) she also started helping me with the girls.  Her kindness that day led to a beautiful friendship that still exists today! She taught me that it was ok to be vulnerable and to ask for help, because we all need it at some point.  Throughout that deployment I watched and learned from this dear friend, she shared her burdens freely as she took on others burdens without judgement. It was absolutely amazing to watch as  other women shared their struggles freely, realizing we have went through it or we were going through it. It was freedom, freedom from judgment or trying to live up to an impossible standard or image.  That day, which I call “blow out day”  I needed a hug, a smile, a kind word, I did not need the judgment and the “my kids would never act like that” look, which I received from many of the women in the store. Since, my time in Hawaii, I have made it through many lows and highs, and my friends, my sisters, have been there through it all.

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Throughout the years I’ve found myself having strong urges to give others compliments and encouragement, because you never know what someone is going through; a simple smile, a kind word, a genuine compliment could brighten their day.  Just today, I saw two ladies jogging, I have seen them consistently jogging, I just ran over gave them a high five and told them they are doing great and are  very inspiring!  YES, some may think I look like a big weirdo, but I don’t care, I really just cannot resist!  Giving random people compliments and encouragement is great,  but, I think it is especially important for women to support, encourage, and compliment each other ……even more!

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We are not enemies, we are not in competition, we are sisters, going through the same struggles of being wives, mothers, sisters, friends, bosses, and all the other zillion things we do!  Listen, I get it….. sometimes as women our first instinct it to compare ourselves with other women, our appearances, careers, talents, our children, and relationships, which only leads to feelings of envy and lowered self-esteem.  So next time, when you admire something about another woman, tell them, don’t keep it to yourself! I truly believe, an unexpected compliment can make a bigger positive impact on someone than you might imagine.  The beauty of being a woman is sharing kindness, speaking life, supporting, and doing this crazy life together!  So next time you see someone working out hard or looking amazing, tell them, maybe give them a shout out “you go girl” or a high five.

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We all have jealousy and insecurities, but if you learn to capture and inventory those thoughts, you will change your thought process from criticism to kindness. The more you practice the easier it gets.  Being genuinely happy for other women is a great thing, and it means you are confident in yourself so that you can truly appreciate other amazing women. I have been blessed to meet so many women, my tribe is full of amazing, beautiful, women, you know who you are, I love you and I am beyond grateful and blessed you are in my life!

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Be a woman other women can trust. Have the courage to tell another woman directly when she has offended, hurt, or disappointed you. Successful women have